Comic Con 2008

Got posted in the Union Tribune. How random.

As my friend Thomas and I got out the public parking lot we instantly joined the endless throngs of Comic Con attendees. I couldn’t help feeling like I was suddenly a part of a mass pilgrimage to the self proclaimed geek Mecca or Shangri-La. It had been many years since I last went to Comic Con. I had forgotten what an attack on all five senses it was.

Sight

Once you enter the massive citadel that is the San Diego convention center, you enter the main hall room. Comic con is one part the bustling streets of New York confined in an enclosed one block radius, except here people will walk slow or stop right in front of you for no reason. In New York that would warrant you a punch to the back of the head. And two parts middle eastern bazaar but instead of selling goats, hummus, figs, and gourds the merchants are selling comics, toys, and art.

Looking around you see every stereotypical depiction of a geek or fanboy there is imaginable. The socially awkward man complete with facial hair and glasses. The pale acne ridden teens with hair that has no style or sense about it. It just is. The sexually repressed men crowding and taking pictures of somewhat attractive women that dress as what I can only describe as medieval or futuristic weapon wielding prostitutes. The older men or women that dress as comic book or anime characters that they are sixty pounds too big to pull off. Then there are those where you honestly question yourself “Is that a costume or is that what they normally dress like?” In fact I was thrown off guard when I saw two attractive younger teens making out with each other in the middle of everyone’s way. I thought “Well what the hell are you doing here? You don’t belong”.

Smell

Apparently in the excitement to see what captivating mysteries that Comic Con holds, just about everyone forgot to shower, or use deodorant, or brush their teeth. You’ll smell things you never thought you could.

Sound

: When I first couple times I went to Comic Con I was naïve and thought the ground floor bazaar was the only thing they offered. But I wrong. All throughout the day for all four days Comic Con offers panels on everything from informative educational questions and answers, discussions with your favorite movie or television stars, and just about everything in between. I found myself spending most my day at the educational panels offering advice on what not to do to break into comics, videogame design, and comic book law. One because fewer people went to them and two because they had a lot to offer. But like everything else, there is a darkside to panels.

My friend Thomas insisted we go to hall H, where the popular panels are held, and by popular I mean seven thousand screaming tween girls sitting between you and the panel in total darkness. If their tween piercing harpy calls weren’t enough, anytime there was a trailer for an upcoming movie the sound was blasted at a deafening level which made you wish for the quieter days of the humble 90’s THX sonic boom. I literally had to hold my hands to ears the entire time.

And what was the hubbub these girls were going crazy over? Twilight, a series of books I’ve never heard of, and I’m guessing you as well, being made into movies. Some call it the next Harry Potter craze but focused on romance. Judging by the “action packed“ preview I would say it’s a movie that makes Telemundo soaps look better acted, more feasible, and with superior stunts. I will give the panel this much, it’s stars where very good looking. But most of the actors seemed higher than kites which left very little to be said except by some strange phenomenon…more girlish screaming.

Taste

Eight dollars for a mini pizza? That’s a lot of money to set off my IBS. A cheddar cheese filled pretzel sandwich? I’ll pass, thank you. Comic Con offers little but junk food does not help with the smell factor. However the food court does offer a window view of the madness happening on the bottom floor.

Touch

Let’s skip this sense, shall we.

Comic Can!

All this being said I really enjoyed my time at Comic Con and it was only when I left that I had a revelation. The people that made up Comic Con were the most accepting people I had ever met. Now matter how absurd or ridiculous people were dressed they were always met with a smile or a “hey, can I get a picture with you?” The hippies in the 60’s failed to bring lasting peace, love, and equality the world. This is a dream I think the Comic Con consort can finally bring to fruition. All we need to do is convince them world peace and understanding are not trivial matters compared to comics, video games, and movies…good luck with that.

Helpful tips for Comic Con

- Wash your hands as thorough and as often as Lady MacBeth. Thousands of people plus heaps of improper hygiene equal sickness abounding.

- Remember to bring your camera. This is a prime people watching experience. I’ll never forgive myself for not brining a camera and missing my photo op with a life sized Jabba the Hut. Oh the scandalous pictures that could have been. Don’t let this happen to you.

- If you really like something and it’s even remotely popular, be ready to wait in lines for a long time.

- bring some VapoRub to ward off the noxious fumes of body odor.

- It doesn’t matter who or what you are. You are welcome and among friends. So relax and embrace your inner geek.